So, it is my personal opinion that birthdays should always be celebrated as though the person celebrating is turning 5 years old. Birthdays should be exciting! It's the anniversary of you managing to make it one more year. There should be friends and cakes and clowns. Well, actually, clowns are creepy, you can keep the clowns...hmm, ponies. Friends and cakes and ponies. Everybody loves a pony.
Anyway, I turned 28 yesterday. It was low-key. There was cake, but no ponies. The most low-key birthday I have ever had. In fact, I made the cake, and ended up organizing my dvd collection and cleaning my apartment. Now, the important people made their appearances over the course of the weekend and it is this fact that really defines the past year for me.
I have learned a lot since this time last year. I have met new people, and made new discoveries. I have defined a long term career goal (editing), which is something I have been trying to do since grade three when they told me I was "gifted", and that I could be anything I wanted to be if I worked hard. Now I'm working hard to become talented enough to edit professionally and to define exactly what field I want to work in. But nothing has been made so apparent to me as the fact that I am loved.
Almost exactly one year ago, I moved out of my parents' house to live on my own for the first time in my life. And since then, I have made new friends and strengthened existing friendships; and I've found that the important people, the ones who really like having me around, have made their presence known. Have made the effort to show me I'm loved. Even when I'm feeling low and cranky.
And I have felt low and cranky for the past week or so. See, "28" was THE age for me. For a lot of people it's 25, or 30, or 40. They pick round numbers, but for some reason, it's 28 for me. That age when I should be "somewhere". Married, 2.3 kids and the white picket fence. Or, I guess, the modern version involves a condo and a high paying career with 1 kid and a small dog. Either way, I ain't living it. I was dreading 28 because I was nowhere near where I thought I was going to be, or where "society" thinks I should want to be.
I thought I would be upset to hit the 19th of April and be living alone and surviving at two minimum wage jobs. It's the 19th, and I'm still happy with my life. I'm about 180 degrees from that place, that career/kids/condo life, and I couldn't be happier about it. I love the life I am living, even though it's not really what I should want. But I'm doing what I want to do and have people in my life who love me, and I don't think I need to ask for more than that.
So if you're reading this, there's a distinct possibility that you're one of the people who love me as I am. Thanks. You've made this past year worth celebrating. Now where's my pony?
